As much as it pains me to say it.. If you thought 2020 was bad, than you were in for a surprise. We truly had no idea what was coming. For it was only the warm up, a preview of the unprecedented horror that would engulf us this 2021. We foolishly and naïvely thought things would get better in the new year, but unfortunately the opposite would happen ten fold. I know its such a cliché thing to say, but it just fits too perfectly..
2021 was 2020 on STEROIDS.
There honestly isn’t that much to say on it, because it was pretty much no different at all, besides one thing. 2021 was quite literally in my opinion, everything 2020 was exactly just significantly worse. The fires were bigger, the hurricanes worse, the earthquakes more destructive, the wars more intense, the political division astronomical, the shipping supply situation world stopping, the droughts drier, the winter more brutal, and so much more. One of the few saving graces of this year, was our consistent visiting of music festivals this year.. It helped keep our spirits up and have some kind of joy in our lives. Also we were able to have a pretty solid amount of social events and gathering, seeing loves we either very rarely saw and some just met for the first time! Being able to have enjoyable times with various people, really helped allot to make the misery of the year tolerable. But back on the rest of the year..
Just as before, really nobody did good this year and was pretty much a universally bad year for all people. My personal life was rough to say the least, relationships becoming rocky, my mental health has been at an all time low.. It has not been easy at all.. Even those around me also had very hard times in many different ways. How could this be? What happened? How could it have gotten this bad… What did we do to deserve this suffering? Because the worst thing of all that has been going on.. Is STILL raging on strong to this day.
COVID-19 continues to ravage and devastate this world.. Worse then ever before. I cannot believe we are still dealing with this nightmare, with no end in sight. What we didn’t really understand too well in 2019 and most of 2020.. Is that this devil virus EVOLVES and MUTATES as times goes on, it literally adapted to become more contagious and deadly! It was seemly every month or two.. A new deadly variant would emerge and devour the entire world.. Our quarantines, lockdowns, mask, and vaccines becoming less and less effective with each super variant being born. I managed up until now to stay safe, get vaccinated, and avoid this devil virus so far.. I thought, at least none of my close loved ones caught it and/or passed away from it.. Well that luck would run out unfortunately one fateful day…
My uncle on my mothers side.. Would catch COVID-19 around late July or Early September I believe. He was not vaccinated and would not fare well against it… He got very sick and had to be put on a ventilator, there he stayed for around 2 months.. Just barley clinging on to life, constantly having surgery’s and holes cut into him to keep him alive. He took an unbelievable amount of punishment. Long story short, after having a procedure done on him that was supposed to help.. Towards the end of October, they checked his brain waves and functions.. They told us he was brain dead. There was nothing anyone could do.
He was already gone.
So with a heavy heart, the family decided that they would pull the plug on the life support and let him be free from this world. We all were devastated and heart broken, we had lost a dear family member.. I had lost my uncle. I have not had allot of experience with death, I don’t really know how to take it.. I just had to take it in anyway I can. In my mourning and despair.. I had the sudden urge to write, to write some deep and meaningful for him.. As if he could read it right in front of me. I poured my heart out and wrote as if my hands were guided by divine hands.. I ended up writing this short poem dedicated to him:
I posted it online to share with my friends and it was universally loved, so I had it printed out and gifted it to my mother as a Christmas gift, who had been very close with my uncle throughout his life.. She loved it. Anyways, it would be around December the 20th that we would finally have him buried and laid to rest. My uncle dying would be the absolute pinnacle of the agony and misery this year would bring, 2021 through COVID-19 literally claimed one of my family members life.. Only a few months before the year ended too..
Now you ask again, how was 2021? How was it for me? It was pain, heartbreak, frustration, loss, agony, and maddening. But yet… I preserve, WE persevere. Yes it all became too much, we just want to give up.. Lord knows I have thought about it many times. But just as I have said before, we must keep going. There has to be a light at the end of the tunnel.. There HAS to be! All this death and suffering, it has to mean something. My hope for a brighter day, is one of the few things that keep me going.. That this hell will end at long last.
Look, I can’t promise you that 2022 will be any better than 2021 was.. Honestly, it will probably be the same or maybe even worse. Never get your hopes up. But regardless if its the same or worse.. Hang in there, you are still breathing and reading this blog for a purpose! After experiencing YEARS of darkness, several lost loves ones, and so much more.. Trust me, I know what allot of you are going through. We all experienced this together, so let us try our best to make this new year as pleasant as possible. 2020 and 2021 took so much from us, and 2022 may take even MORE. You may be feeling like the fragile glass shell that makes up your entire being, it breaking and shattering into pieces before your very eyes.
But God willing, next year when I write my next year end review.. I will still have the one thing these nightmare years could NEVER take from me.
My fighting spirit.
Don’t let them take yours either.
This 2022..
KEEP FIGHTING.
No comments:
Post a Comment